Meri Brown Opens Up About The Life She Wants To Live Amid Issues With Kody Brown

"Sister Wives" star Meri Brown is reinventing herself. The original wife of Kody Brown has been posting a series of cryptic messages on social media lately, that have fans speculating that she may be on the brink of leaving her polygamous marriage for good. In a February post, the mother-of-one shared a frank assessment of her marriage. "A few months ago, I used the word 'estranged' regarding my relationship, in a conversation with a friend," she began. "It was the first time I had vocalized it, and it felt ... honest. It was hard to use, and yet somewhat freeing. I know where my relationship is, I'm not oblivious to that."

Fans of the TLC show know that Kody shares the same sentiment. In an April 2021 episode, the estranged couple celebrated their 30-year "non-anniversary" by going out on a date. The Mormon father opened up in a confessional, and admitted that their marriage had been disintegrating even before he married Janelle, his second wife. However, when Meri fell for a catfishing scammer in 2015, they finally realized that their marriage was in trouble. Kody shared on the series (via People), "I'm looking for a spark — something to initiate some form of desire for a relationship with each other. And in this time, it has never manifest." Now it seems as if Meri may be ready to take new steps for herself.

Now that Meri Brown has acknowledged where her marriage is at, it seems as if she's doing some introspection. 

The "Sister Wives" star seems to be taking stock of who she is, and mapping out the direction she wants her life to take, as she shared an update with her fans on Instagram. In a lengthy caption under a casual selfie, she began, "I was called to love, not to hate." She then posted a list of positive attributes she aspires to, continuing, "I'm here to be a safe place, to have an open mind, heart, and home, and to make others feel loved and cared about." Meri, who vowed to "fiercely love and protect those in [her] inner circle," concluded, "My calling ... is to live a life of passion, of confidence, of authenticity, true to who I am, and true to who God made me to be." 

Now that Meri has clarity about what she wants, many are wondering if she's finally ready to leave Kody Brown — with whom she's certainly not living a life of passion. "I'm not ever gonna be in a conjugal relationship with her, because I'm not going to go through that emotional torture ever again," Kody candidly revealed about his lack of intimacy with Meri on a January episode of "Sister Wives," per Entertainment Tonight. Only time will tell how Meri chooses to continue her journey.