The Messiest Part Of Gwen Stefani And Gavin Rossdale's Divorce

Relationships end for all sorts of reasons, like incompatible life goals, infidelity, or simply drifting apart. If you are part of a soon-to-be split celebrity couple, however, the breakup is usually blamed on "irreconcilable differences" — or at least that's what their publicist will tell you. Indeed, this was the reason given for rock royalty duo Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale's surprise split in 2015 (per TMZ). But, can a decade-long partnership really dissolve over something as simple as not getting along?

Well, yes and no. Despite trying to present a united front by calling the divorce a "mutual decision," details soon came to light that painted a picture of a rocky marriage marred by Rossdale's apparent habit of keeping some significant secrets from Stefani. And, though it's not entirely clear how much was a surprise to Stefani, a few bombshells emerged that would strain even the strongest relationship.

Here's how Rossdale's secrecy likely led to the glamorous couple's demise.

While some degree of privacy in relationships is healthy, secrets are a sure-fire way to erode trust, especially when it involves infidelity. Gavin Rossdale found this out the hard way when Gwen Stefani discovered racy texts between him and their children's nanny (via Us Weekly). The "Don't Speak" singer filed for divorce, later confessing to Harper's Bazaar that the painful find came after "months of torture, trying to figure out this big secret." Unfortunately, it wasn't the first shock that rocked her marriage.

Shortly after their wedding, a Jerry Springer-like twist revealed that Rossdale was not just then-teenage model Daisy Lowe's godfather, but her biological father, too, per People. Although Lowe's birth pre-dates their relationship, Stefani was reportedly left "devastated." While it can be argued that Rossdale was also surprised, Lowe's mother Pearl told Easy Living (via the Daily Mail) that he threatened to cut off contact should Daisy have a DNA test. Hmm.

And it didn't stop there. In a 2010 interview with Details (via the Daily Mail), Rossdale finally admitted to once dating androgynous singer Marilyn — something he strenuously denied when Boy George wrote about it in his memoir. Apparently, he quickly "pleaded" with the editors not to print the news, as — surprise, surprise — Stefani had no idea. At least she apparently knew he cheated on her with Courtney Love, as the Hole frontwoman and notorious pot-stirrer revealed on "The Howard Stern Show" (via Us Weekly). Yikes.

It's easy to point fingers when you're looking at a relationship from the outside. In truth, these things are rarely black and white, and only Gavin Rossdale and Gwen Stefani know what really went down in their marriage. Rossdale, for his part, seems to have genuine remorse about the way his marriage ended. Despite their joint statement claiming the decision to split was "mutual" (via TMZ), the "Glycerine" singer confessed to The Sun in 2017 that it was actually "completely opposite to what I wanted." He later told The Guardian that his most embarrassing moment was "[t]he gross and lopsided spectre of the crumbling of my marriage," adding that the worst thing anyone ever said to him was, "'You lied to me,' when I did."

Stefani, who has always been open about wanting a family, made no secret about the suffering their divorce caused her, telling Harper's Bazaar it left her "dreams shattered." She coped by throwing herself into work, the result of which was the 2016 album, "This Is What the Truth Feels Like." These days, of course, she's enjoying the wedded bliss she always craved with fellow "The Voice" star Blake Shelton.

As for Rossdale, he prefers to focus on what's ahead, telling The Guardian that, "Life is just a series of chapters, and it's essential to try not to bring older chapters into new chapters." We're hoping for many happy chapters for both of them.

Celeb exes love to pretend that they still get along swimmingly, especially when there are kids involved. Yet, no matter how many "conscious uncoupling" statements are released, it's sometimes clear as day that the former lovers would rather consciously stay as far away from each other as possible. And while some exes do sometimes end up being good friends, it's hard to imagine Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale going for a casual Starbucks after the way their marriage ended. Indeed, a source at HollywoodLife claims their communication is strictly kid-related and kept "as minimal as possible," adding, "They have lived very separate lives for awhile now and don't get along." Ouch.

Of course, "sources" aren't always the most reliable, ahem, sources. More telling, perhaps, is the fact that Rossdale didn't even score an invite to Stefani and country crooner Blake Shelton's wedding, despite the former couple's three kids attending. Rossdale didn't seem too bothered, posting a sweet Instagram pic the next day of him and their sons walking on the beach, captioned, "Happy 4th we going this way."

After all, just because you're not good friends, doesn't mean you can't be good co-parents.