This Is Why Ellen DeGeneres Doesn't Have Any Children

Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi live a life one can only dream of. They have a blissful marriage (the couple tied the knot in 2008), a stunning home, and some absolutely adorable pups. It's a wonderful life — one that doesn't include children of their own — and that's just fine with them.

DeGeneres has long been candid about the couple's decision not to have kids. She has discussed the topic so many times that she even created a hilarious Ellen DeGeneres Show segment based off of the idea. Aptly called "Why I Don't Have Kids," the feature shows photos of children getting into trouble, including an older brother who tried to suction his younger sibling into a vacuum and a girl who keyed her dad's car by scrawling "I Love My Dad" across the side.

All kidding aside, DeGeneres' response to the constant questions about children has never wavered. Find out exactly why the couple doesn't have children.

Ellen DeGeneres is waiting for Jay Leno's sperm (and other jokes she's told)

Over the years, it's been heavily rumored that Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi were waiting to have kids because they wanted to find the right sperm donor. When she appeared on The Tonight Show With Jay Leno in 2012, DeGeneres addressed the gossip with her usual sense of humor. "I'm here for your sperm," she joked to the talk show host (via Us Weekly), before revealing the truth. "That is not true. I don't know why people want this. I've said it so many times: We are not going to have a child. And they say that we're looking for the right donor."

"Although, you would be a good donor, so I'll keep it in mind, just in case," she added. "I mean, it would have beautiful blue eyes, and a good sense of humor, and a good shot at a NBC show. We would do well."

In 2016, the talk show host provided a little more insight into why she and de Rossi don't want kids of their own, jokingly telling the The Daily Telegraph"We talked about [having kids] for a minute, about four years into the relationship, but we just decided we like our conversations not being interrupted and our furniture without sticky grape juice on it." Fair enough, TBH.

For every quip, Ellen DeGeneres has also been serious

If there's one thing Ellen DeGeneres knows, it's when to be funny and when to be real. For every time the talk show host joked about why the pair has decided not to become parents, she also injected the humor with serious reasoning. "When I was younger, I really wanted to have a baby — I thought I would adopt. I never thought I would have a baby, but I thought I would want kids," DeGeneres told fellow comedian Jerry Seinfeld on Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee (via Closer Weekly). "[Portia] doesn't want kids."

But it's not just Portia de Rossi who chooses not to have children. In a 2013 interview with Out, de Rossi revealed that DeGeneres ultimately doesn't want to be a mother either."You have to really want to have kids, and neither of us did," de Rossi shared. "So it's just going to be me and Ellen and no babies — but we're the best of friends and married life is blissful, it really is. I've never been happier than I am right now."

DeGeneres echoed the same sentiment in 2015, telling Matt Lauer on the set of The Ellen DeGeneres Show (via Mom.com), "I think I would [like to have kids], but that's not enough to have a kid." She joked, "It seems long term. It seems like a commitment that you have to stick with."

Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi are not regular aunts, they're cool aunts

Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi may not have any children of their own, but they have kids in their extended family that they love and adore — namely their young nieces, Eva and Perry. Over the years, the sisters have made appearances on The Ellen DeGeneres Show. One sweet clip that DeGeneres played on the show featured the girls at 5 and 3, respectively, belting out Katy Perry's "Roar" in the car. An August 2019 Instagram video showed Eva cutting her hair for Locks of Love, which collects hair to make wigs for cancer patients.

In 2015, de Rossi gushed about the girls to Jimmy Kimmel. "They're adorable and we love them and we play with them, and then we leave," she quipped, to laughter from the audience. The star added that each niece seems to have a favorite aunt, de Rossi said at the time, with Perry favoring de Rossi and Eva choosing DeGeneres."[Eva] realizes that the other aunt, Ellen — there's a lot of perks that go along with that," such as free things, celebrity meet-and-greets, and lots of presents, de Rossi said.

Ellen DeGeneres frequently features kids on her show

The Ellen DeGeneres Show is known for its frequent guest stars, whether they're celebrities, viral sensations, or regular people recognized for their courage. Oftentimes, the show also features sweet and spunky children.

In fact, Ellen DeGeneres is credited for jumpstarting the careers of Sophia Grace and Rosie, who first appeared on her show after creating their own routine to Nicki Minaj's "Super Bass." The two girls have not only made multiple Ellen appearances over the years, they've hosted red carpet events, starred in their own movie, and much more.

In 2015, DeGeneres joked to former Today Show host Matt Lauer (via Mom.com) that one of the reasons she decided not to have children was because she's worried that her own child wouldn't hold a candle to all of the kids she's featured on the show."I'm going to compare (the child) to all these kids I've had on the show, who are so smart and so funny, and I'm like, 'You are nowhere near these kids I had on today,'" she said in jest. 

If DeGeneres did want kids, we'd totally want to be adopted by her and Portia de Rossi — just saying!