Everything Taylor Swift Has Said About Her Ex-Boyfriends

Taylor Swift is notoriously private about her relationships and even more so when they come to an end. Although many of Swift's exes have spoken out about the singer, Swift herself has rarely ever discussed her past relationships and partners on public platforms. However, it's a common thing for artists to blend their experiences with their imagination to shape their art, and the case is not very different for Swift.

Often referred to as the Queen of Breakup Songs, Swift often uses her experiences with men as inspiration for her projects. While the singer never names who her songs are about, she does drop clues and hints in the lyrics, letting her fans do all the decoding. Over her years in the limelight, Swift has reportedly dated a dozen men. While most of them have been honored with post-breakup songs, some have been kept away from Swift's creations — and only a couple of men have been publicly talked about.

Based on Swift's own words and fan theories on the internet, we made a list of details the singer has revealed about nine of her ex-boyfriends so far.

Taylor Swift briefly dated singer and actor Joe Jonas back in late 2008 — reportedly from July to October. In November 2008, Swift released her second studio album, "Fearless." Promoting "Fearless" on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" at the time, Swift noted that she added the song "Forever & Always" to the album at the last minute before its release and tactfully disclosed that the song was about Jonas. The then-18-year-old didn't stop there. She went on to reveal that Jonas broke up with her over the phone, and she did so as subtly as she could. As she told DeGeneres, "Some day, I'm gonna find somebody really, really, really great, who's right for me ... When I find that person ... I'm not even gonna be able to remember the boy who broke up with me over the phone in 25 seconds when I was 18."

Over a decade later, in a May 2019 episode of "Ellen," Swift expressed how she really felt about throwing shade at Jonas during her 2008 appearance on the show. During a round of "Burning Questions," a rapid-fire game where guests of The Ellen DeGeneres Show had to answer DeGeneres' questions as quickly as possible, Swift was asked about the "most rebellious thing" she had done during her teenage years. The singer promptly replied, "Probably when I like, put Joe Jonas on blast on your show. That was too much ... I was 18 ... We laugh about it now, but still, that was mouthy ... Just some teenage stuff there."

Having met on the set of their 2009 film "Valentine's Day," Taylor Swift and actor Taylor Lautner first sparked dating rumors in October 2009 — after the two were photographed together on multiple occasions. However, the duo never really made their relationship official while dating and reportedly split in December 2009. They remained on good terms post-breakup, and as Swift told Glamour in 2010, "[Taylor Lautner is] one of my best friends ... He's wonderful, and we'll always be close."

Swift and Lautner once again shared the screen in the music video for Swift's "I Can See You," which premiered at The Eras Tour in Kansas City, Missouri, in July 2023. Following the video's premiere at the concert, Swift invited the cast, which also included Joey King and Presley Cash, to join her on stage. Speaking of Lautner on the stage, Swift told the audience, "He and his wife have become some of my close friends" (via NBC News). Hours later, announcing the video was out, Swift posted a few of its behind-the-scenes photos on X (formerly known as Twitter) and noted in the caption, "[Lautner] is INCREDIBLE in [the video] and shout out to [his wife] Tay Lautner for being so awesome to hang with on set."

Tay Lautner, née Taylor Dome, has also expressed how she feels about her husband's famous ex-girlfriend through a July 2023 Instagram post. Sharing a photo of the three Taylors and one of herself meeting Swift as a kid in 2010, Tay Lautner addressed Swift in the caption, writing, "The way you are so down to earth and authentically yourself after all these years of being in the spotlight is inspiring ... I am honored to call you a friend."

Released in October 2010, Taylor Swift's third studio album, "Speak Now," included the song "Dear John," which, according to theories on the internet, depicted her brief romance and subsequent breakup with singer John Mayer. The singers started dating in December 2009 and called it quits in February 2010. At the time, Swift was 19, and Mayer was 32. Alongside the title of the song, which was deemed self-explanatory by many, certain lines from the track (like "Don't you think nineteen's too young to be played by / Your dark, twisted games when I loved you so?) helped strengthen fan speculations as well.

Through the song, Swift depicts the toxic nature of her relationship with the subject, or Mayer, we could say. In the first verse, she sings, "You paint me a blue sky / And go back and turn it to rain / And I lived in your chess game / But you changed the rules every day." What these lines convey is clear: The subject gave her love and hope only to take it all away and also held the reins of the relationship, steering it however he liked. Swift says she regrets ignoring others when they warned her about the relationship's insidious nature and wonders if it was her "blind optimism to blame."

However, Swift apparently did rise above her pain and freed herself from Mayer's supposed games before it was too late. She says, "I took your matches before fire could catch me / So don't look now / I'm shining like fireworks over your sad empty town." Swift really does shine bright now, whereas some could argue that Mayer's world isn't as peachy, with his own fans turning on him in the last few years.

Released in 2021, "All Too Well: The Short Film" is the visual representation of the 10-minute version of Taylor Swift's 2012 song "All Too Well." With the self-written and self-directed film, Swift once again triggered the age-old speculation that the song is about her romance with actor Jake Gyllenhaal (which lasted from October to December 2010), and for good reason. The main characters of the short — "Her" and "Him" — were portrayed by actors Sadie Sink and Dylan O'Brien, who, at the time of the film's release, were 19 and 30, respectively. Since Swift dated Gyllenhaal as a 20-year-old and is nine years younger than him, fans compared the duo's age difference with that of Sink and O'Brien to prove their point. Among other Easter eggs, Swifties also noticed the 13-years-later version of Him wearing Her scarf in the short, which seemingly alludes to the fact that Gyllenhaal has often been seen sporting a scarf that once belonged to Swift — even after their breakup.

The film starts with shots depicting the seemingly perfect romance between "Him" and "Her," but that romance quickly becomes draining for Her. Soon, Her is shown to be feeling isolated at a dinner party with His friends, highlighting how the two are growing apart. In one scene, the duo has a serious fight, and Him maneuver's Her into stopping it with a hug, completely ignoring Her emotions. When the couple ends the relationship, Her is seen struggling with the heartbreak. Finally, an older version of Her, played by Swift, is shown to have written a book and is seemingly successful, whereas Him is seen wearing Her scarf, which was shown in the film's beginning. Through the film, Swift seems to emphasize that the traumatic experience she had with Gyllenhaal only made her stronger.

The song "Style" from Taylor Swift's 2014 album "1989" is widely believed to have been inspired by Swift's relationship with singer-turned-actor Harry Styles, which reportedly lasted from November 2012 to January 2013. Alongside the title, which is a dead giveaway, certain portions of the lyrics hint at the song's connection with Styles. For instance, at one point, Swift describes the song's subject as having "long hair, slicked back," which is something Styles sported while the two were dating.

That said, when asked why she named the song "Style" during a 2014 radio interview with Ryan Seacrest, Swift had an explanation ready. She noted, "The hook is 'We never go out of style,' and I thought 'We never go out of style' was a long title." However, in the same interview, Swift hinted that her fans were on the right track in figuring out who the song is about, saying, "I have never revealed who it's actually about, but the song kind of speaks for itself. The way this song sounds and feels — that's all I need people to know about that story."

"Style" really does reveal unpublicized details about Swift's romance with the subject — most likely Styles. The main takeaway from the song lies in the second verse, where the subject admits he's "been out and about with some other girl" but "can't stop thinking about" the narrator, who responds with "I've been there too a few times." This seemingly highlights that the two keep coming back to each other while exploring new flames. This sentiment is further strengthened when Swift sings, "We come back every time / 'Cause we never go out of style." Through these lines, Swift seemingly compares her on-again, off-again romance with Styles to trends that keep coming back.

In June 2016, news broke out that Taylor Swift and Scottish DJ Calvin Harris had ended their relationship after 15 months of dating. Years later, in 2022, Swift released "High Infidelity" as a bonus track on the "3am Edition" of her album "Midnights," prompting fans to identify her last days with Harris as its inspiration with one date she mentioned in the lyrics: "April 29." Swifties were quick to point out that April 29th, 2016, was a significant date in Swift and Harris' relationship timeline. On that day, Harris was busy with the release of his song "This Is What You Came For" (which Swift co-wrote under the pseudonym Nils Sjoberg) while Swift was in New York, preparing for her hosting duties at the Met Gala, which took place on May 2, 2016. Since Swift was seen getting down with her next boyfriend, actor Tom Hiddleston, at the Met Gala, fans theorized that she met him in New York on April 29, further emphasizing the date's significance.

In "High Infidelity," Swift sings, "You know there's many different ways / That you can kill the one you love / The slowest way is never loving them enough / Do you really want to know where I was April 29th? / Do I really have to tell you how he brought me back to life?" In these lines, Swift seemingly accuses Harris of gradually killing her spirit by not loving her enough and hints that she spent the said day with another man (allegedly Hiddleston), who reinvigorated her broken heart. The sentiment of the song echoes what an insider told E! News about Swift and Harris' breakup in 2016. As they put it, "[Swift] felt like [Harris] wasn't taking it seriously enough and wouldn't come through for her when she needed him most."

Given that Taylor Swift and English actor Joe Alwyn were together for six long years before calling it quits in April 2023, it's no wonder that Swift has written multiple songs about their relationship and subsequent breakup. One post-breakup song that's absolutely worth exploring is "So Long, London" from the 2024 album "The Tortured Poets Department." The "London" in the song is not only a city Swift admired; it also symbolizes her Londoner ex-boyfriend, seemingly Alwyn.

The song seems to offer a raw look inside the turbulent last stage of Swift's relationship with Alwyn. In the very first verse, the singer says, "My spine split from carrying us up the hill," highlighting the fact that she was the only one putting effort into saving the relationship, and it was burning her out. Later on in the song, Swift says, "I stopped CPR, after all it's no use / The spirit was gone, we would never come to / And I'm pissed off you let me give you all that youth for free." These lines convey that Swift ended up giving up on the relationship for her own good but wasn't happy with the fact that she wasted multiple years of her youth on a fruitless relationship. For context, Swift was 27 when she started dating Alwyn.

Through the song, Swift buries her memories of London and the Londoner with a hopeful heart as she sings, "Two graves, one gun / I'll find someone." She then goes on to further justify her decision to end the relationship with a question she already knows the answer to: "You swore that you loved me but where were the clues?" However, Swift seemingly holds no grudge against Alwyn and wishes him well, ending the song with the lines: "Two graves, one gun / You'll find someone."

Dropped as a part of the 2024 album "The Tortured Poets Department," Taylor Swift's "The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived" is a song that aptly captures Swift's rage against a former lover. According to fan speculations, the song addresses singer Matty Healy — who briefly dated Swift back in the summer of 2023 — and we can't really disagree. For starters, the song's title seems to take a jab at Healy's height or character. There are several other references scattered throughout the lyrics as well. For instance, in the first verse, Swift sings, "You tried to buy some pills / From a friend of friends of mine," which most likely hints at Healy's history of drug addiction.

Throughout the song, Swift questions the subject's duality and describes the damage he had caused using metaphors. In one portion, she sings, "You hung me on your wall / Stabbed me with your push pins / In public, showed me off / Then sank in stoned oblivion." These lines depict how the subject idolized the narrator but didn't refrain from abusing her — be it mentally or physically. She then poses questions like, "Were you sent by someone who wanted me dead?" This could mean that Swift had her soul crushed by Healy, and for some reason, it was nothing less than a crime. She elaborates on the sentiment in the lines: "I would've died for your sins / Instead, I just died inside / And you deserve prison." Swift also questions his true intentions twice in the song, noting, "I just want to know / If rusting my sparkling summer was the goal." She concludes the song by saying, "And I'll forget you, but I'll never forgive / The smallest man who ever lived." This represents the fact that Swift may someday get over the trauma Healy caused, but his actions will remain unforgivable.