The Tragedy Of Diddy's Late Ex Kim Porter Is So Sad

Note: This article includes a discussion of domestic abuse allegations.

While some aspects of Kim Porter's life were certainly on the glamorous side, that's not to say she didn't endure a lot of hardship prior to her tragic death at the age of just 47. On the contrary, the late model went through a lot of heartache — and on some occasions, she was pretty vocal about it. 

We'll start with perhaps the most obvious (and certainly most publicized) sad detail of Porter's life. That would be, her on-and-off dynamic with the now-disgraced Diddy. Porter had been dating the rapper for three years and was pregnant with their first child together at the time of their first split — a split brought on by Diddy's very public relationship with Jennifer Lopez. Speaking to Essence in 2007 about the situation, Porter revealed that she'd heard about it from a friend first, and then the media storm began. Understandably, she told the outlet that she'd felt humiliated. However, what made things worse for her was the amount of pity she got. "Everywhere I went, people were asking, 'Are you okay?' I just hated that," she recounted. 

Even with Diddy in another relationship, Porter shared that he continued to be present in her life, and not by her choice. In fact, she told Essence, "He was very, very intrusive." That's a detail Diddy's former bodyguard Gene Deal has addressed as well. Speaking on "The Art of Dialogue" in 2023, Deal claimed that there would be times he'd drop Lopez off at home, and immediately start calling Porter, trying to find out where she was. That wasn't all, though: Deal also alleged that Diddy would arrive at her house with a team of bodyguards whenever she had a potential new fling, and make advances knowing they'd be too scared to do anything about it. "He made it very uncomfortable for that person," Deal said.

Though Kim Porter and Diddy reconciled in the early aughts, the Jennifer Lopez relationship wasn't to be his only indiscretion. On the contrary, Diddy was embroiled in a paternity scandal in 2007 — and once again, Porter found out about it while she was pregnant. This time, she was carrying her and the rapper's twin daughters, Jessie and D'Lila Combs. 

Sadly, as had been the case with Diddy's relationship with Lopez, Porter had to find out about her boyfriend's infidelity through a friend. Understandably, that stung. Speaking to Essence just months after the interview where she'd opened up about their last break up, she explained, "I would have preferred to find out from him" (via People). Porter even extended him some grace on that front, noting that she could understand that it would have been tough for Diddy to have to tell her about the pregnancy. However, the ultimate zinger was the fact that she saw him as a friend in addition to her partner. "Most of all, we were friends. Even if I couldn't have understood it as a woman, I would have understood it as a friend," she said. 

Unfortunately, that wasn't how it all played out, and Porter told Essence that when she left Diddy, she sent a clear message that she was calling it quits once and for all. "I wanted him to know I wasn't breaking up with him for two weeks — or maybe leaving for two days. If I pack up everything — twins and all — it means I'm out! Puffy's an action person, not a talk person. So I had to have an action," she said. Sure enough, the couple stayed apart after that. However, she shared that the one consolation was that they remained amicable.

Another sad detail to have come out about Kim Porter is the (unproven) allegation that her relationship with Diddy was an abusive one. As we said, Porter didn't shy away from talking about his disregard for her need for space after the Jennifer Lopez scandal (a bold move, given it had been a joint interview with Diddy himself). And, as we mentioned, one of Diddy's former bodyguards made disturbing claims about his behavior around Porter's love interests. All of the above could certainly count as psychological abuse — and former editor-in-chief of Vibe Danyel Smith has alluded to that being a possibility. 

Speaking on "The Fall of Diddy," Smith shared that she and Porter had been out together one night when the rapper appeared unexpectedly. "He just started hollering at her that she should be at home and not out. And then he grabbed her handbag and literally turned it upside down. He just emptied it out in front of everybody," she recounted (via The Mirror U.S.). As for physical violence, Smith added that she'd never witnessed that between the couple. Granted, she did add the caveat, "As we all know, that's not the only kind of abuse."

It does bear mentioning that other insiders have said they didn't believe there was any physical abuse in the relationship. Speaking to Vanity Fair in the wake of a controversial posthumous "memoir" (more on that in a bit), Porter's best friend Lawanda Lane rubbished the idea in no uncertain terms. Referring to an allegation made in the book about Diddy throwing a chair at Porter, Lane shared, "If he had thrown a chair at her, she would've killed him."

If you or someone you know is dealing with domestic abuse, you can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1−800−799−7233. You can also find more information, resources, and support at their website.

Fans across the world were shocked in 2018 when it was announced that Kim Porter had passed away. However, it seems the model had been sick for several weeks leading up to her death. In fact, TMZ reported that she'd been put on a vitamin drip two days prior, and even told a doctor she'd coughed up blood-streaked mucus. In addition to that, InStyle also shared that Porter had lost her appetite and had body pains. 

One particularly sad detail about Porter's final days is that she hadn't been with her daughters. As Diddy told Essence in 2019, "She sent the kids over to my house so they wouldn't get sick. One night I was checking on her, and she was like, 'Puffy, take care of my babies.' She actually said that to me before she died." Though the twins weren't home, it was a small consolation that Porter had other loved ones with her. As noted by TMZ, she'd been watching movies with some of her relatives the night prior. Heartbreakingly, though her goddaughter also stayed the night and looked in on Porter the next morning, she had no idea that the model had taken a turn for the worse and left her to sleep. It was hours later that someone else went to check in again and realized that she was unresponsive. 

Porter's official cause of death was listed as lobar pneumonia, and though she'd had symptoms for a while, there's no question that her passing came as a shock. In a since-deleted Instagram post, her son Quincy Brown wrote, "I am broken ... & the only thing that makes sense right now is that you were way too good for this silly world we live in," he wrote (via Metro). 

Yet another heart-wrenching layer to Kim Porter's passing is that her children weren't together when the news broke. In fact, they hadn't even learned of her death before the press reported it. In his interview with Essence, Diddy said that he'd had to take major steps to ensure each of the children found out from him, rather than the media. 

"I sent people in every direction to make sure the kids would not hear about it on social media or the news. I had to get to the girls' school and find Quincy, who was on set in Atlanta. Christian was on a plane, and I had his phone disconnected so he wouldn't read it in the air," Diddy told the outlet. 

Speaking to Angie Martinez a few months after his mom's tragic death, Christian Combs didn't reveal exactly how he'd learned the devastating news but confirmed that he had gotten it while at the airport. "I was shocked. I ain't know what to do — I was like ... My whole world stopped," the then-20-year-old recounted. However, he added that he felt as though his mom had sent him a message right away. "As soon as I got in the car, my song 'Love You Better' came on the radio, and I'm like ... I know that's her talking to me," he said. 

In the time since Kim Porter's passing, a number of unsavory accusations have been leveled at her famous ex — and sadly, that's meant Kim Porter has come under a microscope as well. A number of very bold claims have been made about the late model, including that Porter had written a memoir filled with damning revelations about her life with Diddy. Sure enough, a book was published and sold on Amazon, even racking up a ton of sales. However, there was a lot of controversy surrounding it. 

For starters, Porter's ex-boyfriend (and father of Quincy Brown), Al B. Sure! claimed on Instagram that while she had worked on a book, the one that was published had a bunch of added, untrue details. Al B. Sure! also made the explosive claim that Porter had been murdered. Understandably, Porter's children were horrified by the book's existence (and doubtless Al B. Sure!'s claims) and issued a statement to that effect. In addition to rubbishing the claim that Porter had written a book altogether, they also shared that all the rumors doing the rounds were only adding to their grief. "We are deeply saddened that the world has made a spectacle of what has been the most tragic event of their lives," they wrote in the statement shared on Instagram. They ended the statement by asking people to respect their mother's memory and allow her to "rest in peace. It's what she deserves." 

In response, Amazon told People they would no longer be selling the book on their platform. However, something tells us we'll continue to hear conspiracies surrounding Porter — and with her no longer here to share her own truth, that's the saddest detail of all.