Devastating Details About Kerry Washington's Childhood

Kerry Washington is best known for starring in "Scandal" as Olivia Pope, a fictional crisis manager inspired by real-life crisis manager Judy Smith, per Shondaland. Unfortunately, Washington's most famous role came decades after she lived through some pretty devastating childhood events. If you had no idea, you're like most of the world. Although Washington has spent her career happily sharing her acting talents, activism, and killer wardrobe with fans, she's kept her private family life and her husband, Nnamdi Asomugha tucked squarely away. In September, however, Washington released her first-ever memoir, "Thicker Than Water," which has revealed more about the star's life than she's ever shared in the past.

One of the most shocking facts to come out of the memoir is the fact that Washington's parents recently revealed that her father, Earl Washington isn't her real father. Instead, she was conceived by a sperm donor. According to Washington's interview with The Hollywood Reporter, processing this life-changing as she was working on a "Scandal"-related book inspired her to write something more substantial. Then came her memoir. And while it's surely chock-full of never-before-shared aspects of Washington's life, it's also filled with sad details about her traumatic childhood.

Kerry Washington's revelation about her biological father came later in life, but she also wrote in depth about her experiences while she was still growing up. In an excerpt from "Thicker Than Water," Washington revealed that her parents fought often over their individual gripes and that she believed they stayed together only for her. "So, when they fought, I took it as my failure, and felt like it was my job to fix it," Washington explained in Oprah Daily. The self-applied pressure caused her to have panic attacks at the age of 7. "They manifested first as a rhythm of anxiety that encircled my brain, then evolved into a rapid pulsing, a whirling frenzy of metallic thumps, like those nauseating old spinning rides at a county fair," Washington continued.

Later in life, while in college, Washington also struggled with an eating disorder, which she wrote about in "Thicker Than Water." In a promotional interview with Robin Roberts, Washington shared what triggered her. During the interview, Washington described her dynamic with food, likening it to "a toxic cycle of self-abuse that utilized the tools of starvation, binge eating, body obsession and compulsive exercise" (via People). Unfortunately, Washington, at the time, considered committing suicide. However, she has since developed a much healthier relationship with food, even if it's not perfect. "There's no suicidal ideation, that is not where I am anymore," she added.

Kerry Washington also wrote about the sexual abuse she experienced as a child. While speaking with Robin Roberts, Washington shared that a young boy repeatedly touched her inappropriately while they were both children at sleepovers. But she never was able to scrounge up the courage to tell her parents, partially because she wanted to protect the boy. "I have a great deal of compassion for where the choice came from, and even a little admiration for that little girl, but I also adore her and feel so sad that she carried the burden of that on her own for so long," said Washington about her decision (via People). "And so, I wanted to make a choice to tell a truth that she couldn't," she added.

Washington also addressed the abuse while speaking to The Hollywood Reporter, revealing that she blamed it on partially fueling her eating disorder. "I also don't think it's disconnected from the sexual abuse, or from being born into a body that I felt there was mystery around," said Washington. "I could not have articulated that to you before this revelation." Washington also addressed the possible connection to Hollywood, as well as her family's history of addiction. "I come from a legacy of addiction — it runs very deep in my family, and I think this is how it was expressed for me," she added.