Why Pamela Anderson Regrets Her Marriage To Dan Hayhurst

The following article contains mentions of domestic abuse.

Pamela Anderson's relationship history is long, complicated, and oftentimes heartbreaking. Despite being one of the most recognizable faces of the '90s, Anderson's career was disproportionally impacted by the stolen sex tape of her and then-husband Tommy Lee. The scandal not only affected her professional aspirations, but also her marriage to the Mötley Crüe drummer. In her 2023 memoir, "Love, Pamela," she explained the ramifications the tape had on them. "It is still a great cause of pain for us all. It ruined lives, starting with our relationship," Anderson penned.

Anderson and Lee's marriage ended in divorce in 1998. After a brief engagement to Swedish model Marcus Schenkenberg that ended in 2001, Anderson tied the knot a second time in July 2006. But Anderson's marriage to Kid Rock lasted only four months, with both filing for divorce separately a couple of weeks after she suffered a miscarriage that November.  In 2007, Anderson married poker player Rick Salomon, but the union was annulled just a few months later. That wasn't the end of the relationship, though.

The pair tied the knot a second time in January 2014, but it ended a year later. Anderson moved on with French soccer player Adil Rami in 2017, a relationship that ended two years later — again, amid some drama. By January 2020, the actor wed producer Jon Peters but separated mere days after, before official papers were filed. Despite the head-spinning mess, none of these instances compares to her last marriage to Dan Hayhurst. 

Seven months after separating from Jon Peters, Pamela Anderson started going out with Dan Hayhurst. Three months into it, Anderson was once again married. But it didn't turn out well. "It ended up being a disaster," she told Vanity Fair in January 2023. After a lifetime of relationships with famous men, Anderson wanted to experience the mundane. So amid the COVID-19 pandemic, she left California and retuned to her native Canada.

In her search, she fell for a man who was working as a contractor on her home renovation project and as her bodyguard. But normal didn't translate into good — or even remotely close to it. "It was worse than any of them," she told The Sunday Times in January 2023. Anderson regretted her decision to marry Hayhurst almost immediately. He pulled her into a lifestyle that didn't suit her and, soon enough, she felt trapped. "I realized, oh my God, I'm caught up in this whole thing, what am I doing? It just struck me, this is another disaster," she detailed.

With Hayhurst, Anderson felt reduced to a housewife — one forced to cook with ingredients she felt uncomfortable with and to pay for it. "I was just like a short-order cook. And they ate meat!" said Anderson, who is an animal activist and longtime vegan. "I was paying for everything, cooking, cleaning for everybody." She wanted out. Just 13 months after saying "I do," Anderson split from Hayhurst.

The tape may have been the beginning of the end for Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee, but it certainly wasn't all there was to it. In February 1998, Anderson called the police on Lee on accusations he kicked her while she held their newborn son, Dylan, the Associated Press reported. He pleaded no contest that April. A month later, a Malibu judge sentenced him to six months in jail, the Los Angeles Times reported. They divorced that same year.

Anderson had already filed for divorce once — in November 1996 — but later withdrew the petition. A lot of their marital problems reportedly stemmed from Lee's addiction. "She's back with her husband and standing by him through his alcohol abuse," his publicist told Variety in December 1996. Lee's alcoholism continued to raise problems for the family. In 2018, Lee ended up in the hospital after an altercation with their oldest son, Brandon. Lee was reportedly under the influence, TMZ noted.

After divorcing, the couple reconciled and broke up several times. Despite all the drama and back and forth, what Anderson felt for Lee remained unchanged throughout her life. "My relationship with Tommy may have been the only time I was ever truly in love," she wrote in "Love, Pamela." Ahead of the 2023 Netflix documentary, "Pamela, a love story," Anderson reportedly told him as much via text message, according to TMZ. "In hindsight I realize I only had one true love," she wrote him.

If you or someone you know is dealing with domestic abuse, you can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1−800−799−7233. You can also find more information, resources, and support at their website.