Celeb Spouses Who Hate Being In The Spotlight

There are only two ways you get fame in this world — either you chase after it, or it ends up finding you. And for those who stumble upon fame, the adjustment from anonymity to life in the spotlight can be a tough adjustment. The transition is even more difficult, however, when it stems from a romantic connection. Although some people might think securing fame through a relationship is a fairytale scenario, it's definitely not the ideal situation for countless celeb spouses who are uncomfortable with being in the spotlight. And what about the situations in which one member of a celebrity power couple suddenly gets fed up with fame? 

Yep, there are plenty of celebrities out there who are itching to ditch the spotlight while their partner is still lusting after notoriety. It's a tricky dance, to say the least, because it's not easy choosing between your privacy and the person you love. So, which celeb spouses are grappling with the realities of fame? The names might surprise you.

Being a celeb spouse in the world of reality TV, especially when you're an incredibly private person. Just ask Cole DeBoer, who married Teen Mom 2 star and MTV celebrity Chelsea Houska in October 2016. DeBoer, who first met Houska at a gas station in 2014, was never impressed with her reality star fame and he refused to let MTV film him at the beginning of their relationship. In fact, DeBoer was perfectly content to live a low-key life out of the spotlight working as traffic control specialist before meeting Houska. Unfortunately for DeBoer, however, he was forced to step in front of the cameras once his relationship with Houska became serious.

The good news for DeBoer is that he still gets to put his foot down when it comes to privacy issues. Not only did DeBoer refuse to film his proposal for Teen Mom 2, but he also passed on having the couple's wedding ceremony on TV. "MTV is begging her to let them film it but Chelsea refuses," a source said about Houska's supposed desire to honor DeBoer's wishes, according to The Ashley's Reality Roundup. "She usually stands firm on stuff like this, so it's unlikely that she'll change her mind. Besides, Cole has never really been comfortable doing things on-camera."

Not only that, but DeBoer doesn't host fan events like some of his Teen Mom 2 co-stars do (*cough* Javi Marroquin *cough*) and he avoids attention-seeking posts on social media. Pretty refreshing for a reality star, right?

You don't need to be a particularly observant person to pick up on the fact that President Donald Trump's wife, First Lady Melania Trump, doesn't seem to like the spotlight despite her many years as a celeb spouse. Although it might be confusing that someone as private as Melania would marry an extroverted and fame-loving guy like Trump, it pans out when you consider their lives together pre-White House. For years, Melania enjoyed a quiet life in New York City while Trump hobnobbed with A-listers and chased after television fame á la Celebrity Apprentice. And following the birth of the couple's son, Barron Trump, in March 2006, Melania became even more of a recluse as she acclimated to her life as a mom. The dynamic worked out perfectly because each party got what it wanted: fame for Trump and privacy for Melania. 

Of course, this all changed when Trump was sworn in as president in January 2017. "What's happening is exactly what she didn't want to happen," a source said about Melania's predicament, according to People. "They've literally become like the Kardashians: scandals, divorces, headlines. [...] No one was paying attention to her two years ago. Now it's a 24/7 tornado. She hates it."

Adding fuel to the theory that Melania hates the spotlight is a telling statement she made in December 2016. "I would spend my holidays on a deserted island, a tropical island. With my family," Melania said about her ideal Christmas plans, according to The Daily Beast. A girl can dream.

Shortly before TLC premiered season 7 of Counting On, news broke in December 2017 that Jill Duggar would no longer be on the show. The announcement shocked fans because Duggar grew up on television with 19 Kids & Counting, and she seemed to love the franchise.

So, why did Jill decide to leave the series? Fans should look no further than her husband, Derick Dillard, for the answer. Dillard, who wed Duggar in June 2014, has a very complicated relationship with fame, and he's the one who pulled the plug on Counting On. 

Following reports that Dillard was fired from the show for making controversial comments about transgender reality star Jazz Jennings, he took to Twitter on December 15, 2017, to clear the air. "Unbelievable what's considered newsworthy these days ... For the record, I was never fired," Dillard tweeted in response to an article claiming he was canned. "I just felt it best for my family to cut ties months ago, as we are heading in a different direction."

As for the "different direction" referenced in Dillard's tweet, that would be a life off-camera spreading God's word. Dillard, who became a student at Cross Church School of Ministry in August 2017, also aspires to be a vocational minister. 

Although many people view Amal Clooney as George Clooney's wife, others know her as a respected international human rights lawyer first and foremost. From drawing awareness to human rights violations at the United Nations to defending government leaders, Clooney's career is no joke. But as difficult as Clooney's distinguished career might sound, she reportedly finds the fame that comes with being a celeb spouse to be much more challenging. 

"Amal has a stressful career; the cases she works on are hugely important — but it's actually the less meaningful things that are really making life a challenge for her right now," a supposed source explained in April 2015 (via The Independent).  "She says she can handle the job stress because that's what she knows, but this whole celebrity thing, it's just much harder."

George, who is used to living in the spotlight, is understanding of Clooney's internal struggle. "It's a little like being in a parade, and it's not easy — particularly for [Amal] — because, in general, we live a very private life," he told The Hollywood Reporter in September 2017.

Clooney, to her credit, also tries to find the good in her celebrity. "I think if there are more people who now understand what's happening about the Yazidis and ISIS, and if there can be some action that results from that, that can help those clients, then I think it's a really good thing to give that case the extra publicity that it may get," Clooney reasoned, according to BBC News.

Once upon a time, Brian Austin Green was one of the most famous teen actors in the world, thanks to a little show called 90210. Now that Green is a full-fledged adult, however, he  apparently wants nothing to do with all the fame and attention he begrudgingly became accustomed to in his youth.

"I hated being famous during 90210," Green admitted in a September 2010 interview with Details magazine (via HuffPost). "I'm not an extrovert. I'm 37. I have a beautiful wife. I have an amazing 8-year-old son. I love acting, but this is just my job." 

Unfortunately, Green has trouble staying out of the spotlight thanks to his celeb spouse, Megan Fox. "It wasn't so much of a problem before Megan, but once Transformers hit, that was it," Green added (via DigitalSpy). "I had never experienced paparazzi on that level, because during 90210 they were still developing pictures and selling them by hand. It was a whole different experience." Different experience, indeed.

After Julia Roberts got hitched to cinematographer Danny Moder In July 2002, she seemed to disappear from the spotlight. And given the timing of Roberts' sudden need for privacy, it's reasonable to theorize that Moder, who never attempted to court fame, might be to responsible for this shift. Roberts never was shy about enjoying her celebrity status, after all.

Well, there's a good chance that Moder did encourage Roberts to leave the public eye, because it sounds like she would do anything to make him happy. "I was my priority, a selfish little brat running around making films, according to Harper's Bazaar. "It was meeting Danny...finding my person. When I think about what makes my life my life, and makes sense and just shine inside of me, it's him. Everything has come from that for me."

And by the looks of it, keeping Moder pleased entails avoiding red carpet events and staying off of social media. Moder is so private, in fact, that each time he makes a public appearance it generates headlines. Not to mention, Moder has never given a interview to the press — a surefire sign that he enjoys the private life. The only time Moder has spoken out publicly is when he teamed up with Roberts for a PSA about protecting the environment. 

If you're not familiar View star Meghan McCain's conservative writer husband, Ben Domenech, it's because his identity was kept a secret prior to the couple's engagement news getting leaked in November 2017. Yep, for two years McCain kept Domenech's name under lock and key, only referring to him as her "boyfriend" in Instagram posts. Making matters even more confusing is that McCain refused to reveal Domenech's name when she was forced to confirm their engagement on The View. "... You may have read something on the internet last night — I am engaged," McCain said during a taping of the show, according to ET Online. "We've been together for years and we have been engaged for a while. [...] It was a secret, I was hoping to get married and people wouldn't find out, but people talk sometimes."

So, what's up with all the secrecy here? As it turns out, Domenech is an extremely private guy who doesn't necessarily enjoy McCain's life in the spotlight. Not only is Domenech's Instagram account private (no shocker there) but he has never talked about McCain publicly. As for why Domenech is so reclusive, the likely explanation is that he doesn't want fame to interfere with his serious journalism career. Another possibility is that Domenech doesn't want to be accused of nepotism in conservative circles — his father-in-law is Arizona Sen. John McCain, after all. But who knows? Maybe Domenech will become more visible now that the cat's out of the bag.

During Gossip Girl's five-year run, actor Penn Badgley's face was just about everywhere. Things changed, however, when Badgley started dating doula and musician Domino Kirke in 2014. Kirke, whose sister is Jemima Kirke of Girls fame, isn't interested in the high-profile lifestyle of a celeb spouse because of the party atmosphere it attracts. For Kirke, staying sober is one of her top priorities, and she doesn't want to jinx it by courting the spotlight. 

"I never really was a big partier, but it kind of caused me to be in these melancholy, depressive states that were more of the problem," Kirke said about giving up partying, according to Girlboss. "It wasn't the actual going out at night and being crazy, it was more the way I was feeling in-between. So, I chose to take it out of my life [...] I have a really strong meditation and prayer practice, and I just feel like I'm awake for the first time since I was a child, really." Kirke also admitted that "partying with famous artists [...] kind of scared [her] off" from pursuing a life as a celebrity. Makes sense. 

Plus, Kirke is all about keeping things in her life as normal as possible. From enjoying life with her son, Cassius, to building her doula business, Kirke has no interest in taking advantage of Badgley's famous name. 

Although Ashton Kutcher is a famous actor, he doesn't actually enjoy life in the spotlight. In fact, Kutcher wishes he could press the restart button on his entire career.

"Sometimes as an actor I wish I could start my career over. Where people don't know anything about me and I'd never do an interview and I'd never do a talk show because I'd never want them to know anything about me," Kutcher revealed in October 2016, according to The Associated Press. "I think if you can do this job and be successful at the level of success you want to attain and do it without any of the fame — that would be the ultimate gig."

Kutcher also isn't shy about his desire to live a more quiet life in the tech industry. "For me, the most entertaining evening would be to go sit with entrepreneurs and talk with them about how they're building their companies and how we can help to make them better," told Esquire in February 2013. "That's the one thing in the world — well, I love doing that."

Still, as much as Kutcher tries to ditch fame, he can't shake it thanks to his celeb spouse, Mila Kunis. She continues to star in major movies and she regularly appears on talk shows to promote her work.

If you're wondering where Freddie Prinze Jr. has been these past few years, there's a good chance you're not alone. But don't worry about whether Prinze is doing okay — the truth is privacy is what makes him happy. Yep, Prinze is not a fan of the spotlight these days, and he's not afraid to tell people what he really thinks about the concept of celebrity. 

"Over a decade ago, probably in the '90s, when a lot of the Brits came over and started editing our magazines we didn't have a royal family, and our president and his kids weren't exciting so they turned Hollywood into the royal family and started commenting on their personal lives as if it was news and not entertainment," Prinze explained, according to CBS News. "And that's all it is. At this point, actors and musicians and athletes get dehumanized to the point where they're stalked and hunted like wild game."

And if you're thinking about calling Prinze and his celeb spouse, Sarah Michelle Gellar, a "power couple" — don't. "Everyone has these tags and terms and people don't realize what they're doing. Even with personal lives, people want to be entertained, but I've never committed to that. When people say things like 'power couple,' my brain mutes it," Prinze added, according to CBS News. "She's my wife. I'm her husband. We're trying to raise two kids and do what we do best to make a living and provide a future for our family."