The Real Reason Kendra Wilkinson And Hank Baskett Split
Kendra Wilkinson went from being a party girl and one of Playboy founder Hugh Hefner's many girlfriends on the E! series The Girls Next Door, to becoming a wife and mother of two in the blink of an eye. She decided to hang up her bunny ears in 2008 when she met former professional football player Hank Baskett, and what came next included the couple's June 2009 announcement that they were expecting a child and later that same month, they walked down the aisle at the Playboy mansion to become husband and wife.
Two children later, the couple has spent the majority of its marriage in front of reality TV cameras on their WE tv show, Kendra on Top, and sadly, it didn't take long for the duo to crack under pressure. From cheating allegations to battles with depression, this union appeared to be hanging on by a thread. By April 2018, Wilkinson confirmed the divorce rumors in a heartbreaking admission. Despite their best efforts, here's the real reason Kendra Wilkinson and Hank Baskett split.
They moved at lightning speed
After announcing she'd split with Hugh Hefner in October 2008, Wilkinson revealed the following month that she was engaged to Baskett. Hefner gave his ex his blessing. "[She] has met someone who she would like to spend the rest of her life with," he said in a statement (via People).
Her relationship with Baskett moved full steam ahead, with the couple confirming in June 2009 that they were expecting a baby. They got married at the Playboy mansion just a couple of weeks after the baby news was confirmed.
After tying the knot in front of 300 guests, the couple honeymooned in St. Lucia, according to E! News, and almost six months after the wedding, Wilkinson gave birth to their son, Hank IV. Are you keeping up with this timeline?
Let's recap: she went from living in the Playboy mansion to getting pregnant to getting married to being a first-time mom in just over a year. Whew! It's no wonder this whirlwind romance began unraveling at the seams almost as soon as it started.
His alleged affair still haunts her
When Wilkinson was eight months pregnant with their daughter, Alijah, the former football player approached a couple in an attempt to score some pot, reported People. The couple reportedly gave Baskett a phone number to call, and he was later led to a house. After using the restroom at the home, he emerged and was reportedly greeted by a transgender woman in the nude. "I froze," Baskett said, recalling the incident. He later admitted he was fondled by the woman.
Wilkinson was reportedly tipped off about the dirt right before the news hit the press. Baskett initially denied the allegation, until it was revealed the woman had taken a lie detector test to corroborate her story, reported People.
Wilkinson, who was rightfully ticked off, flushed her wedding rings down the toilet. A source said she was trying to be strong throughout the scandal but would cry "every day."
"I messed up," Baskett told People. "I put myself in a bad situation. And everything through me brought pain upon this family."
After the incident, the couple focused on rebuilding the relationship. "It's going to take a lifetime to trust him again," Wilkinson told Us Weekly.
When trust is broken, it's difficult for a relationship to recover, and this was something Wilkinson had to find out the hard way.
Temptation was everywhere
When Kendra Wilkinson landed a gig in the Las Vegas production of Sex Tips for Straight Women From a Gay Man, it brought a huge change to their household "It was hard for Hank to accept, because it meant I would move away from my family for four months," she told In Touch Weekly.
It wasn't just the fact that she was going to miss his presence. Wilkinson was more concerned with staying faithful during their time apart from one another. "At the end of the day, the downside of being married is the temptation all around. You know, the sexual temptations," she said. "I am not going to lie — I am a sexual person. I am a 32-year-old person, and sometimes the temptation calls. My fantasies are very strong, let's just leave it like that."
Although her Las Vegas gig came to an end in January 2018, being back under the same roof still didn't bode well for this ill-fated couple.
She was a single, married woman
When the couple appeared on the Steve Harvey talk show in 2017, Wilkinson admitted she had "divorce on my mind" during the cheating scandal. She found herself dealing with an internal battle: She wanted to be single, but she also wanted the "freedom to explore mentally, but not physically" with other people. Baskett agreed to let her roam, but under one condition: She wasn't allowed to "cross the line."
"It's not like you get the best of both worlds. I was like, you know, 'Go out' — she was hanging out with people, people would text her — but I would rather that, than her sneak around and hide things," he said.
During that time, Wilkinson even reconnected with a man from her past, reported E! News. She admitted that she still had feelings for him, but she reassured Baskett that "nothing ever happened physically, or nothing even crossed the line."
To most people, taking the time to be technically single while still being legally married sounds like a recipe for even more trust issues. It's obvious their unconventional approach to mending their relationship was a flop, but we'll get into that in a bit.
Postpartum depression put her in a 'black hole'
After the birth of her son, Wilkinson discussed her powerful battle with postpartum depression, telling In Touch Weekly, "I felt like I was in a black hole. I had so much anger inside. I'd lock myself in my closet to cry and scream." The reality star even attempted to end her own life twice. Her mental anguish caused so much strain, she and Bassett began sleeping in separate bedrooms.
After the birth of their daughter, Wilkinson spoke to E! News about her mental health. "I had postpartum after little Hank and then I was dealing with chaos after Alijah with postpartum, so I had pretty bad experiences right after having each kid."
Come to find out, Wilkinson wasn't the only one in the household who was suffering.
After hanging up his cleats, he slid into a depression too
Baskett spent the majority of his professional football career bouncing around to various teams, including the Philadelphia Eagles and the Indianapolis Colts. Perhaps he didn't end his NFL tenure as a Hall of Fame player, but at least he was gainfully employed while putting all of his heart and soul into the sport that he loved, no?
This could explain why he found it difficult to adjust to life after football when his career puttered out following the 2010 season. "The stress and depression was eating away at me," he told People magazine. "I fell into what happens to a lot of professional athletes who change careers. It hit me, and it hit hard."
He turned to marijuana and alcohol and was prescribed antidepressants. "I was drinking like I had never drank before," he said, revealing that he would get the shakes and cry in the shower due to his severe anxiety.
Wilkinson, who was pregnant with their daughter at the time, admitted she was a horrible support system for him during his lowest point. "Anytime he said, 'Kendra, I'm not feeling too good,' I would say, 'Shut up, I'm pregnant!' I never gave him the opportunity to come to me with his feelings." she said.
Her mom didn't like him
Wilkinson took a break from her WE tv reality series to appear on a season of Marriage Boot Camp: Reality Stars: Family Edition (via E! News) alongside her mother, Patti. The mother-daughter duo was slated to deal with their personal relationship issues, so imagine how shocked Wilkinson was when her mom revealed she was never really happy about her relationship with Baskett.
"When you came to me and said, oh I met this guy, he's an NFL player, he said to me, I want Kendra at all my home games. Kendra's gonna stop [The Girls Next Door], and she's not going to do anymore appearances," Patti recalled. "My radar from that point on was up about him ... I thought, oh he's going to control her."
Her mother's disapproval likely added yet another layer of stress to the couple's struggling marriage.
They've threatened divorce many times
A source told People magazine in March 2018 that Baskett and Wilkinson had ditched their wedding rings, saying Wilkinson had "really lost trust in her marriage and she's realized there's no turning back."
All of the scandals — as well as their arguments, depression, and on-camera fights — had taken a toll. According to the insider, "Kendra is just not happy. They bicker all the time and she hasn't been able to trust him."
It didn't help that Wilkinson's Las Vegas gig supposedly drove an even bigger wedge between them. "They've grown further and further apart especially while she was in Vegas. He would come to visit her and she went back home about once a week, but it was really hard on them," the source said.
Wilkinson even revealed that during that time, going their separate ways was always on their radar. "We have already threatened divorce probably five times," she told In Touch Weekly.
She had a social media meltdown
After being spotted sans wedding rings at their son's soccer game, a source close to the couple was asked if a divorce was imminent. "I would think so. I wouldn't say it's happening yet, but it's not good."
Things really came to a head in March 2018 when Wilkinson had a public meltdown on Instagram Stories (via People). The reality star appeared to be at her wit's end after close to nine years of marriage when she posted melancholy photos along with captions that read, "Pray for Kdub lmao," and "Life isn't making any sense to me right now, sorry I've been MIA." In some of the photos, it appeared that she had just finished crying, and she asked her followers, "How much strength does it take to be strong?"
On a more promising note, she told her fans: "I need to love myself again and I will. Life is too precious ... Thank u to those behind n pushing me with love. My next fight will be for the KO."
It was pretty clear that her marital struggles were the reason for her somber mood, which lead many to believe a divorce announcement is imminent. We wish Wilkinson and her family the absolute best, and there's no doubt that whatever choices she makes, she'll come out on top no matter what.
Everything she did wasn't good enough
As things between them went from blissful to rocky, Wilkinson and Bassett tried desperately to keep their relationship afloat. They attended couples therapy sessions, and they even tried to reignite the spark they once felt by going on a golf date. Although their outing was marred by a public screaming match, it was apparent they were fighting for their marriage, albeit they would ultimately lose the battle when Wilkinson filed for divorce on April 6, 2018, citing irreconcilable differences.
But in the days leading up to the divorce news, Wilkinson took to her Instagram Stories (via People) to pour her heart out. "Ten years," she said with tears streaming down her face. "I did everything I could. It wasn't good enough."
As the videos continued, one after the other, she confessed to her loyal followers that her heart "will always remain open for him." However, chances for a future reconciliation seem slim. "I believed in forever, I really did," she said. "Guess it's just not meant to be."
Fear got in the way
Days after taking a photo in what appeared to be a divorce lawyer's office (via People), Wilkinson posted the above snapshot to her Instagram, along with a caption that read in part, "Today is the last day of my marriage to this beautiful man. I will forever love Hank and be open but for now we have chosen to go our own ways ... We are both amazing parents and our kids will be happy n [sic] never know the difference other than seeing mama smile."
Baskett's well-being was also on her mind. "I want to see happy Hank again... I miss that," she wrote.
As if she didn't already have a multitude of reasons to ditch her Mrs. title, she explained that she "did believe in forever," but "too much fear has gotten in the way."
Before signing off, she ended things on a positive note. "Thank you Hank for a beautiful 8 years of marriage and 2 beautiful kids. I feel so thankful and blessed," she wrote.
They had different parenting styles
Although Baskett is described as being "an amazing father" to their two children, the former couple's different parenting styles were cited as a potential catalyst for their split. A source told People, "Kendra's personality is much more proactive and commanding, but Hank has a quiet strength."
That said, their clashing approaches to childrearing reportedly didn't change the way they loved and cared for their kids. "They're honestly both incredible, devoted, hands-on parents. They don't miss practices or life moments and will do anything to protect their kids," the source added. "Their family is so important to both of them ... Whatever happens, they'll stay close because their kids mean too much to them. They'll always be in each other's lives."
Conflicting parenting styles don't always cause a relationship to crash, but in the case of Wilkinson and Baskett, it obviously didn't bode well for their struggling marriage.